Why I'm not crocheting any more presents for anyone ever again... maybe

Katie Lee writes...

Ever since I started crocheting, making gifts for people has been the thing that has really brought me pleasure. Every Christmas I make big plans to crochet everyone on my Christmas list a gift. Invariably, I run out of time before the big day arrives, but it's the thought that counts.

Of course, I always beat myself up about my failure to produce goodies for all, but I don't think anyone on my gift list is ever too cut up about it. Most of the presents I've made people (often at their request, might I add) seem to languish unused and unloved in some cupboard somewhere, acting as nothing more than a glorified moth restaurant. My sister's tea cosy sits unused and unloved in her spare bedroom (taunting me every time I visit), My boyfriend's grandma has hidden the cosy I made her in her kitchen drawer and uses a different one, and I've never seen any evidence of the little bag I made my niece being put to use (in fact, I've never seen it since that fateful day it was unwrapped with much false glee.) As for my friend Lia and her various gifts: well, the least said about those the better.

Screw 'em, that's what I say. If they can't appreciate the genius of my ugly creations, then I'm just going to keep all that crafty crochet goodness to myself. Ungrateful wretches. Apart from the hat I made my niece, the two hats I've made for my new baby niece-in-law (which she has no choice but to wear), and the skull and cross bone placemat I made for my skull-loving friend, apart from all those gifts, I'm not making gifts any more... OK, that's probably a lie - making things for other people is more fun, even if they do just quietly secrete them into a bottom drawer for the moths to enjoy. The buggers.

Katie Lee is editorial director of Shiny Media, and writes her own personal craft blog, wittily entitled Good Hooking. She's also writing a green wedding column for Bridalwave. She sure does get about.

Have you made presents for people that they've obviously never used? Share your frustrations with Crafty Crafty! Leave a comment and get it off your chest - we won't tell anyone.

Fawn

Most of them know there was time and effort spent by you to make the gift, so they over cherish it and don't want to use it and have it get stained or wear out, or another host of reasons.

Taking it as a slap in your face, will only cause you pain, until you know whether it is a real slap or a very loving gesture on their part.

Fawn

It looks like there needs to be a part three also. This is part two:

Finally, we give gifts because we love the person. If there are conditions to the gift, let it be known when or before giving the gift.

Like I did, with the man and the baby blanket.

If we don't speak up. they, the reciepient, cannot read our minds. So many times we fume and fuss, quietly and mistakenly.

Communication is the key.

If you want to know why they don't use the gift, ask them. You may be surprised that it isn't lack of appreciation, but as I said, it is over appreciation.

Fawn

I have to break this up in two posts, because I keep getting the error message that says "text entered is wrong try again."

This will be part one:

Sometimes it is not lack of appreciation, but over appreciation. Perhaps the tea cozy's are being used for special occasions, because it is a special gift to them.

So many times, we take lack of appreciation for what we think people are doing.

I am crocheting a blanket for a baby. I told the father if he ever felt like giving it to a thrift store I wanted it back, but if the child uses it and drags it all over becuase he loves it I don't care. The father's reply was, " After he uses it for the newborn months, we will put it up and away, because it should be something precious."

See no lack of appreciation, but over appreciation.

The girls purse, it could be that it is not her style after all, maybe her color but not her style.

Now how many of you, if you recieved a scarf you hated and just hated, would constantly wear it? I for one would not.

There is the quandry. Do I tell the person I hate what they made for me and hurt their feelings, or do I keep mum and just find a friend that loves it and will use it?

Katie Lee

Yeah, I'm not going to stop making presents really. It's too much fun!

On reflection, I can think of at least one thing that someone has made me that I don't use, so I'm not so innocent myself! That said, most crafty gifts I've been given have been well loved (including a scarf I'm wearing right now!)

Carly

Hilariously I have made gifts since I was 6, and at 24 years old I am still renown for making gifts for family and friends. May it be photograph books for an anniversary with hand decorated pages, baskets of handmade chocolate goodies and cakes, hand decorated gift boxes or stuffed toys. I’m guessing some people think I’m being cheap and others think I’m showing off! I often have the family roll their eyes as me as I “waste my time” making these things when I can buy them. For every person that threw a gift to the back of the cupboard, or quietly hid them in the bin under newspapers (yeah-you know who you are!)I found every now and then, someone REALLY appreciates what you have done for them.

My Granddad told me a few months back, that he still has the stuffed otter with the wonky eye and one short leg I made him when I was 13, sitting next to his clock. My Boyfriend’s parents were so grateful for the handmade photo album I created last year for their anniversary, that it often leaves the box and is shown to guests.

Sometimes people will appreciate the effort and sometimes it goes unnoticed. The thing is…if you just stopped making these things and showing the effort for people you care about…they would soon miss the fuss you made over them…so yeah, it’s still worth the effort even if you don’t always get a pat on the back for it.

Maybe be more selective about who you make things for?